Freedom Series – Fear

God has said that I’m a queen not a pawn. Before, I really felt like I was just part of some big game and I was insignificant. But we’re actually royalty. We’re queens on the chessboard. We can go wherever we like. And to be honest, it’s a bit scary putting it out there. The fear of failure comes into that one for sure. One of the things that I know God has been journeying me on is in the area of fear. Fear in me didn’t look like me being afraid but actually looks more like anger or frustration and more often than not it’s fear of failing. And so, I can get frustrated with myself or frustrated with a situation or with a person. It’s a mask for this fear in me that I don’t want to fail, I don’t want to get it wrong. And there’s this fear of disappointing people around me.

I know that fear is a normal emotion. Everyone experiences it. I get that. I don’t think it’s something that we ever stop experiencing. Even though I experience fear, I’m not driven by it. And that’s the question for me. Is it possible to live life in a way where I experience fear and then I decide to do things anyway? I guess I’ve come to a point of really journeying with God in love because 1 John 4 talks about how perfect love casts out fear and I’ve come to the point of realizing that I don’t overcome my fear by simply trying harder, by somehow trying to work out courage and bravery in myself, but rather if I want to overcome fear, I need to spend time with God understanding His heart for me. Any fear that is impacting me to the point that it is changing my decisions or motivating my decisions, that fear is an indicator that I haven’t come to grips fully with the affection of God for me.

And so if you’re someone in that space grappling with fear and being motivated by fear, I want to encourage you, just stop. Close your eyes. Rest your head and lean in on the one who loves you. It’s His affection that undoes and uproots the grip of fear in our lives, and the more we encounter His love and tenderness for us, then we can truly walk free from fear. We’ll still feel it but we won’t be driven by it. He just loves us and I’m coming to grips with the fact that He’s not afraid to love me over the top.